Kids Poems To Jingle Your Christmas Tingle

Christmas comes just once a year
The day that Dad drinks too much beer

Mum gets stressed, her nerves all jerky
Glugs red wine and burns the turkey

Sister feeds her face with chocs
Turning white, pukes on her socks

Doggy chomps on stale mince pies
Making smells that sting your eyes

Granddad starts to dance and rap
Spits his teeth into my lap

Nan says Mum's too good for Dad
And should have wed that other lad

Aunty Babs loves mistletoe
And kissing with my Uncle Joe

The fighting starts. The yearly strife
'Cos Babs is Uncle Tommy's wife

The neighbours bang upon the walls
As Uncle Joe and Tommy brawl

Aunty Babs pretends she's sad
And goes outside to find my dad

Daddy burps, falls on the floor
As Mum and Gran walk out the door

Nana tuts, "I told you so."
As Dad and Babs roll in the snow

Mummy grabs my sis and me
And off we’re dragged to Nan's for tea

Dad keeps phoning all night long
Telling Mum she's got it wrong

We go back home at ten that night
The house is a disastrous sight

But Christmas comes just once a year
The fights, the bird and too much beer

All my friends say it's a shame
That every Christmas is the same

But that's the way it's always been
And as we all help Mummy clean

We laugh – Mum, Dad and Sis and me
A kind of happy family

"Life's not perfect," Daddy cheers
and we all smile from ear to ear

At least we know on this one night
We've got a year to get it right

©2009 Mark C Bird

xx x